


Such A Difference Between Us

by Sxymami0909



Category: Grimm (TV)
Genre: Baby Fic, Breastfeeding, Episode Tag, F/M, Late Night Conversations, Talking
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-11-15
Updated: 2015-11-15
Packaged: 2018-05-01 16:12:27
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,775
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5212352
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Sxymami0909/pseuds/Sxymami0909
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Tag to episode 5.03 ‘Lost Boys’. Picks up after Nick goes to lay with Adalind. Nick isn’t quite sure how to feel about his new makeshift family. Title taken from ‘Hello’ by Adele.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Such A Difference Between Us

**Author's Note:**

> This is my first Grimm fic and I have a feeling it won't be my last. -sigh- I'm obsessed...I can't even. I ship the thing so hard.

_“Thank you.”_

The soft sound of her voice echoed in the quiet room and by the time Nick turned his head to look at her, Adalind’s back was already facing him again. He kept his eyes on her for several seconds before once again glancing up at the ceiling. He swallowed hard and held back a sigh, the burning in his eyes making him close them briefly.

It was quiet… _too_ quiet. A soft sigh came from the portable bassinet beside him and Nick turned his head in his son’s direction a part of him willing the infant to wake so he’d have something to do. The Grimm could hear Adalind’s breathing evening out and if she wasn’t asleep yet he knew she would be soon.

A part of him wondered how it was so easy for her to share a bed with him. People were at their most vulnerable in sleep and being vulnerable wasn’t something Adalind did well. But it was clear she trusted him, not just with their son’s safety, but with her own. And Nick wished she wouldn’t. It made it that much harder to deal with the emotions he’d been attempting to suppress in the wake of everything that had happened. He wanted to hate her. A part of him _did_ hate her.

But another part of him was thankful for their son and by extension Adalind. With the death of his mother and Juliette  there wasn’t much to keep him going outside of a burning desire for revenge but when he looked at his son, that rage inside of him calmed. Kelly was the only bright spot in the pit of darkness that his life had become. Nick’s chest tightened and he couldn’t help the guilt that filled him.

His hand clenched on the gun he was holding, fingers flexing before relaxing around the cold metal. He blew out a breath as he continued staring at the ceiling. Nick wondered what Juliette would think if she could see him now. Would she hate him? He still remembered the look of betrayal she’d sent him in the police station when he stopped her from hurting Adalind. Tension filled his body at the thought.

Conflict swirled inside of him. On one hand he felt guilty for keeping Adalind safe, for accepting her and their son into his life after everything she did; after the part she played in what Juliette became. But at the same time in the end Juliette hadn’t been the same woman he fell in love with, something else he blamed himself for…and Adalind.

He shifted carefully and a soft whimper from Kelly pulled his focus from his thoughts and to the infant near him. Nick carefully pushed himself up, making sure not to disturb Adalind. He placed his gun carefully on the nightstand and dropped his feet to the floor standing up and stepping over to the bassinet.

The infant looked up at him another small whimper falling from his lips and Nick let out a soft ‘shh’ before carefully lifting Kelly up, “It’s okay, come on let’s go in the other room and let mommy sleep.” He whispered to the baby as he walked slowly out of the bedroom into the main room the cold floor stinging his bare feet.

Some of the tension eased from Nick’s body as he walked around the living area with his son, body oscillating gently in an attempt to get Kelly back to sleep. He was exhausted. The Grimm had barely had one full night’s sleep since his mother and Juliette were killed and it seemed like the only time he could truly relax was when the infant was in his arms.

Nick continued moving back and forth and when Kelly’s eyes started to fall shut he glanced over towards the open metal sliding door where Adalind was sleeping or so he thought.

Adalind shifted, rolling over slightly as her eyes fluttered open. When they adjusted to the darkness her brows drew together at the empty bed beside her. She pushed herself up figuring she must have fallen asleep. She sighed and brought a hand up rubbing the corner of her eyes as she slid to the edge of the bed and glanced over at the bassinet.

Fear slammed into her and she shot out of bed, heartbeat thudding heavily against her chest as flashes of the interrogation room with Nick’s mom flew through her head, the day she lost her daughter. “No,” she whispered panic building in her chest. “Kelly, Kelly! Nick!”

The sharp yell startled Nick and their son making the infant jump slightly in his arms. His entire body tensed as he turned to face the bedroom just in time to see Adalind run out, panic on her face, the fear he saw in her eyes making his chest tighten. “Adalind, hey we’re right here.” He told her his tone calm.

She spotted them almost immediately; Nick cradling their son in his arms and tears immediately built in her eyes as she swallowed hard in an attempt to calm herself down. She closed the distance between them and held out her arms.

Nick held her gaze for a minute as he carefully shifted their son into her arms. He watched as she held Kelly close to her, pressing a kiss to his forehead and whispering soft things to him. The Grimm slid his hands into his sweats pressing his lips together trying to find a way to bring up what had just happened. “He woke up,” he explained finally, “I took him out here so we wouldn’t wake you.”

Adalind glanced over at Nick and nodded, “I’m sorry,” she said quietly the emotion in her voice clear, “I thought,” she let out a shaky breath, “I thought maybe you changed your mind.”

Nick shook his head. “I told you, no one is going to take him from you.” He replied his tone quite as he continued to watch her.

Adalind nodded. “I know you said that,” she answered, “And I’m trying very hard to believe that. I’m trying hard to do a lot of things.” She replied just as quietly as Kelly whimpered slightly shifting in her arms.

Nick frowned as he watched Adalind rock their son slowly in her arms. “And what I’m not?” He’d been with her helping her take care of their son since he was born. “You’re here aren’t you? I haven’t hurt you or left you to fend for yourself. I’m here for Kelly and for you what more do you want?”

Adalind blinked at his sharp tone and she pursed her lips, holding their son closer to her. “I didn’t say that. I know you’ve been trying Nick. And I know this isn’t the greatest situation and it’s weird and uncomfortable. But we need to make it work for Kelly’s sake.” She stated as she looked down at the infant in her arms. “I don’t want him to grow up with us at odds, I don’t want to always have to wonder if something I do is going to make you think Kelly would be better off without me.” She blew out a breath and looked back at Nick.

“I know I’ve done some pretty bad things and I’ll take responsibility for those, but you’ve done some pretty awful things too. I’m not the only one to blame for the way we were.” She stated pointedly needing to get that off her chest.

Nick crossed his arms over his chest, his jaw clenching. “You tried to kill my aunt.” He stated, it was probably the least of her offences, but it was what had started everything.

Adalind held her ground. “I was following Sean’s orders. You’re a Grimm Nick, before you none of them ever stopped to ask and see if we were good or bad, they just killed us. I grew up with the stories…I was doing what I had to do. You took away my powers,” she countered, “It doesn’t sound like much but you literally ripped out a part of who I was. I felt empty,” she admitted quietly.

Nick swallowed hard at her admission. His hand clenched as he watched her. “You put Juliette in a coma.” He stated, “Everything that happened after that was your fault.”

“I did that to hurt you for the way that you hurt me. Being a Hexenbiest is all I’ve ever known and you took it from me. Sean told me I was useless to him after that, my mother said it was my fault for being weak…I lost _everything_. So I wanted to take everything from you. I’m not condoning what I did, but can you really blame me?” Her words were hard, but her voice was still soft. Kelly shifted in her arms again and her gaze fell on her son again. “He’s hungry,” she told him as she started to walk back towards her bedroom.

Nick followed behind her not quite ready to end the conversation just yet. “You pretended you were Juliette, you manipulated me, you took being a Grimm away from me.” He said pausing at the foot of the bed as he watched Adalind sit down and get back onto the bed until she was leaning against the headboard Kelly cradled in her arms.

Adalind shot a glare at Nick. “You took _my_ daughter from me,” she snapped doing her best to keep her temper in check, “You’re a father now Nick, tell me how would you feel if someone you trusted took Kelly from _you_. I wanted revenge okay. I was angry I was in pain and I know what I did was wrong. I’m sorry. I’m sorry I hurt you, I’m sorry Juliette turned into a Hexenbiest and I’m sorry she’s gone. I never meant for any of that to happen.” She felt her chest tighten, “But I did what I could to help…I took the suppressant so I could be here and be better for Kelly because I know what I’m like when the Hexenbiest is inside me. I’m doing everything I can to be a good mother. I’m trying to change. And you look at me like I’m the same person who did those things to you.”

Kelly let out a soft cry cutting his mother’s words off. “It’s okay sweetie,” Adalind whispered as she looked down and lifted her t-shirt up on one side unhooking the nursing bra as she helped their son latch on the her nipple so he could eat.

Nick glanced away from them until his son’s mouth was on her breast and then looked back taking her in. He was angry, angry at Adalind because she was right to an extent, angry at Juliette because she hadn’t fought for them and instead let the power and darkness control her but most of all angry at himself. He and Adalind had done terrible things to each other. She wasn’t the only one who had manipulated and hurt people. He had too. Neither one of them were innocent. But Kelly was. And as crazy as this whole situation was Nick knew they needed to wipe the slate clean or they’ve never be able to move forward.

He stepped forward pausing beside Adalind. “I’m sorry.” He offered. “You’re right. We’ve both done some pretty terrible things. It’s going to take time, this thing…it’s awkward, but Adalind know this,” he hesitated a second before sitting down beside them resting his hand on the back of Kelly’s head briefly, “Our son isn’t going anywhere. I won’t let anyone take him from you. I will protect the two of you with my life.”

Rosalee told him Kelly wouldn’t be the only one who needed him. And he wasn’t sure how he felt about that, but honestly Nick wasn’t sure how he felt about much lately. He hadn’t really processed everything that happened yet and he wasn’t sure he wanted to right now. Nick wasn’t okay, but with time he might be. For now he needed to focus on what was happening with the uprising, he needed to find Trubel, and he had to make sure his family was safe.

Adalind caught Nick’s gaze and she could see the truth in his eyes. She swallowed hard and nodded. “I know you don’t trust me,” he opened his mouth she shook her head and continued before he could say anything, “I understand why you don’t. And I’m obviously not entirely there yet either, but Nick I’m on your side. We don’t always see eye-to-eye, but you’re Kelly’s father so from this point on you don’t need to worry about me switching sides or…whatever. I don’t want Kelly to grow up without you. Maybe with time, we’ll even be friends,” she said softly. “For now I just want us to be here, I want Kelly to have us both and I want everyone to be safe and I’ll do whatever I can to help make sure we are.”

Nick studied her face and he was pretty sure he’d never seen Adalind so sincere, which threw him. That was the problem. Adalind wasn’t completely bad and he could see that. The more time he spent with her, the more he got to know her and see her with their son the more he realized there was a different side to her. Nick was softening ever so slightly when it came to Adalind and every time he realized that he would put up a wall because it felt like a betrayal to Juliette. She hadn’t even been gone 3 weeks. He needed time, they all did.

Nick pulled himself from his thoughts and reached up to rub the back of his neck. “Maybe.” He replied quietly as he finally pulled his other hand back from Kelly’s head. “He’s hungry tonight.” He commented.

Adalind turned her gaze on their son and nodded. “Seems to be.” They sat in silence after that for the next five minutes as Kelly nursed. When he was done he released his mother’s nipple with a sigh and Adalind righted herself pulling her shirt back in place before she started to lift Kelly against herself to burp him.

“I can do it if you want to get some rest,” Nick offered getting up and grabbing one of the burp cloths from the side of the bassinet.

Adalind nodded and waited for Nick to take him from her. When he did she watched them for a minute, her body relaxing a bit again. She knew everything wasn’t going to be resolved with one talk, but it was the most they’d said on the issue since Nick found out about Kelly and that was something. She yawned and leaned back against the bed.

“Go back to sleep,” Nick said catching sight of her yawn, “I’ve got him. He’ll probably be hungry in the next couple of hours so sleep while you can.” That seemed to be how it worked, though he was pretty good at sleeping so far.

Adalind scooted down so she was back to lying with her head against the pillow. “After he burps will you bring him over here? He can sleep with us…I mean if you still don’t mind staying in here tonight.” She added.

Nick patted his hand gently against Kelly’s back as he watched Adalind and shook his head as their son let out two small burps. “It’s fine. I can still stay.” He told her lifting the cloth from his shoulder and hanging it back over the bassinet before bringing Kelly to the bed and placing him down beside Adalind and then getting into the bed on the other side of the infant. He relaxed slightly. This was better…having their son there made sharing a bed with Adalind feel less wrong somehow.

Adalind smiled at Kelly and ran her hand down his back gently. “Mommy loves you,” she whispered as she leaned in pressing a kiss to their sons head before settling close to him and letting her eyes flutter shut. “Good night Nick.”

Nick’s gaze drifted from Kelly to Adalind. “Good night Adalind.” He replied his hand stretching out slightly to rest right beside his son, briefly brushing against hers in the process. Things weren’t perfect and he wasn’t sure they ever would be. They’d both been through so much, been the cause of so much pain to each other. But for right now in this moment with his son and Adalind beside him, safe, he could let himself rest and maybe, just maybe have a few hours of peace.


End file.
